Talking is useless if nobody is going to listen
By Lethbridge Herald on October 5, 2024.
Editor:
Men like me must learn to shut up and listen. My favourite sage Yogi Berra said, “If you have nothing to say, don’t say it.” Also, “Men speak because they have to say something. But women speak because they have something to say.” I have now realized that for peace of the world the ability to listen well is a more important skill than to speak well.
Many people are angry because they don’t feel their voices are heard. We talk a lot and a few of us listen. Too many people are convinced that it is more important to know how to speak well than to keep the mouth shut and listen. I think it is a serious problem.
Talking is useless if nobody listens. A man went to a wedding and shook hand with the mother of the bride and said, “My mother died yesterday.”
She answered: “How very kind of you! Thank you.” We worry so much about the right thing to say but hardly listen to what people are saying. We have to remind ourselves that by listening we are showing our respect for the person.
When your little girl comes to you telling you nothing important, wasting your time, you must know she is telling you she loves you very much.
You are ignoring your child’s existence by not listening to her rumble. Acknowledging your daughter’s love is surely more important than to file the tax return on time. Our world needs good listeners more than good speakers.
We must realize that today’s the emergence of the angry extreme right could be the result of people feeling their voices were ignored by the elite who are good at words.
“People talking without speaking…People hearing without listening…And no-one dared to disturb the sound of silence.” ( Simon and Garfunkel.)
When I started my first job in administration, every morning my secretary brought tea to my desk and waited for my words to start the day. I had thought that was the way the world was run. As a result, when I retire and the joints begin to creak, the most difficult thing to get used to is people start telling me how my life should be run. They know what is good for me and tell me so.
My experiences and opinions don’t count any more: “You are too old and don’t know anything.” That may be so but it’s not easy to admit that. It’s hard to realize that it’s my turn to wait for other people’s words. It’s a new skill I have to learn.
I have entered a beginner’s class in the art of listening. The first step is to learn to keep my mouth shut.
I realize that many problems facing society is the illiteracy in the art of building consensus. That requires good listening. Political debate today is verbal combat. It is the way to divide us into losers and winners, not the way to build a community based on compassion and love.
If it sounds like a preacher talking, forgive me. You must know I am preaching to myself. Until recently, as a preacher and a teacher, I had assumed I was always expected to speak first. I realized however that listening is more important than speaking.
Another challenge is: “What about pure evil?” Is there any point listening to the likes of people like pedophiles, racists, or believers in genocide.
I have never met anyone like that so I am not sure how I would react if I came face to face with such a person. But I dare to say “yes” we need to listen to them. We have to find out how any human can turn into such an evil. So I still say a good listening is very important.
Tadashi (Tad) Mitsui
Lethbridge
19-18
Great comments Tad. My senior friends and I are all in our 80s and 90s and we have been making it a point of listening to what people are saying and are disgusted by what we are hearing. The fools in the videos who are blindly supporting mentally challenged Donald Trump are the same as our fellow seniors who should be a lot smarter but aren’t. Some of the comments stating that there will be civil war if Trump loses by ignorant seniors is sickening.
But then we see the people attending these Danielle Smith gatherings are no different. Once again in attendance we see the majority are our fellow seniors believing every lie she feeds them as she puts their lives at risk by what she is doing to our healthcare system, showing no intelligence what so ever.
At the federal level Reformer Pierre Poilievre has them convinced that he should Axe the Tax while oil executives tell us that the Carbon Tax is the cheapest and most effective way to fight Global Warming and 27 countries in the world agree. Not only does Poilievre shows no respect for seniors who desperately need the money the Rebates bring he showed no respect for the Ottawa citizens and police officers involved when he was praising the convoy truckers. Not carrying about the $65 million debt they created for taxpayers proved that there is nothing Conservative about him.
All in all our fellow seniors need to wake up and stop believing the lies they are fed by these politicians who are only interested in getting elected. The truth is easy to find if you look for it, isn’t it?
I still remember the stupid senior supporting the Coutts blockade who said on TV “We have guns and know how to use them, or the idiot on Jan. 6 dressed in a Viking costume who made certain that he got on TV. Can you be any dumber that these two? Both ended up in trouble with the law.
i hear you
Over 50 years of being among the drug community in cities around the world, I was totally shocked with the ignorance we displayed in this community, when it came to addicts. The Do no Harm groups, MSTH, the churches, and of course the paid social services all knew what to do and did it!
They knew from the onset that it would destroy the downtown of this small community and ensured NO OTHER PLAN ever saw the light of day! They can say they did not realize it would get this bad, but thats from a lack of LISTENING! If they insist it isn’t “that bad” then they are demonstrating “DENIAL”!
I attended a meeting held by Marshal Smith (Chief of Staff to the Alberta Premier) where he explained “Lethbridge would be the pilot city for HIS new project”. The resounding applause from Lethbridge Housing Authority, Councillors, Social Services people, ex-SCS people was overwhelming!
They all applauded the demise of our downtown for promises of endless money supporting their pay check!
No one actually LISTENED to what this guy was saying, nor bothered to filter out the BS and think, NO ONE!
They were applauding the cities downtown becoming the Southern Alberta Rehab Facility?
This Marshal Smith plan was in the works at the sametime I made my proposal in writing to CIty Hall. As time progressed I was given an opportunity to present the plan to Marshal Smith and did so! It did not take long for me to realize that he had other plans, and was not listening to a word I was saying. I spent 90% of my time listening to him describe his “greatness” and the other 10% of the time he took pot shots at things within my plan that made no sense. For Instance;
He asked me what I would do, if I walked into my proposed facility and found an individual injecting drugs in his bunk? I thought that most peculiar because I had briefed him as to exactly what my background was and I was not trained medically, nor was I familiar with what the law would or would not allow me to do, nor what Alberta policy was at the time.
So basically I said I did not know the answer to that question but if in that ciricumstance I would have reported it to the staff.
His response: AHA this is nothing more than another SCS!
It was then I knew I was not privy his hidden agenda, which was HIS PLAN!
So since trying to save Lethbridge’s downtown, which I started in 2018, here was the path to failure.
1) Proposed my Plan to City Council via 37 page document
2) Talked to an SSIG group member and asked if I could present the document to them.
3) Rejected by SSIG which was composed of 95% Social Services and Churches running support groups for Addicts. (No wonder, my proposal would have put them out of business
4) Was requested to come to SSIG for what would be an opportunity for SSIG members to defecate on my idea and me, and not allowed to present the document.
5) Went to various meetings at City Hall promoting “the plan”.
6) Committee responsible for SSIG report and my submission refused to table my submission but happily forwarded on the SSIG recommendation to destroy our downtown with the makings of the Southern Alberta Rehab Facility foundation in the downtown.
7) Went to the next committee meeting where I requested from that committee in writing why my plan was not forwarded with the SSIG recommendation- Got NOTHING from anyone!
8) Suddenly Marshal Smith decides Lethbridge will be the pilot project for his “Destroy the Downtown” Facility.
9) Shortly after Lethbridge Housing Authority (Mayor was/is a board member) becomes the GOTO for all matters handling Homeless Housing.
10) City unloads shelter to Lethbridge Housing Authority, so they can distance themselves from the disaster, which is about to unfold! (next 5 years)
11) LHA announces a FASD facility one block from the Drug Capital of Lethbridge (Shelter) which makes no sense to me or to anyone with a brain the size of a Pea! Low Aquity individuals being confronted with a “try a little taste of this, you will like it”!
1) Streets Alive suddenly buys a $2.5million dollar Eldorado building next door to the shelter and the Southern Alberta Rehab Facility takes one more giant step towards development! Its good to be poor!
And, there you have it. If you do not Listen, you get a Southern Alberta Rehab Facility in your downtown and you don’t even know it!
PS Can’t wait for the Who allowed this to happen!, Why was I not told!, who made these decisions? Where was I when this all happened? I will arrive at that meeting with Popcorn!
The answer: YOU allowed this to happen, YOU did not Listen!
Who am I? 50 years of exposure to addicts who ruined 30 cities while politicians let the Poverty Pimps take charge and destroy everything in their cities.
It is exactly the same thing the Politicians are allowing in Lethbridge today! Meanwhile the Poverty Pimps have a new idea (old, been tried over half a century elsewhere and failed) which they package as a “game changer”! After all Savin Lives (while destroying everyone elses) is all that matters, or does it?
Speaking of Mr Smith………. https://edmonton.ctvnews.ca/alberta-premier-s-key-strategist-on-addiction-recovery-to-exit-role-1.7067271